Worth the wait.

I can honestly say that I have never been as unreservedly excited to meet a new baby as I was to meet Miss Camila.

Lily, love, I had the “excited” part with you x 1,000, but it is the “unreservedly” part that got me. With you, for every second I was happy-excited, there were at least as many moments when I was terrified out of my mind. All the questions. Would I be able to feed you, would you have colic, would you be a non-sleeper, and how in the world would I keep from completely screwing you up? With Baby Cami, all that scary stuff, well, that stuff’s not really my problem.

And to all the other babies who came before Lily, I was excited for you, too, but in a very different way. I had no idea what it meant to be a mother. Not only that, but I was in a place so far away from even trying to understand what life with children would be like. So I was totally clueless.

I’ll never forget sitting in Brandy’s living room, watching her hold her firstborn, Aiden, and my little brain just couldn’t comprehend it. It was like we were baby-sitting, and she was holding a baby cousin or something. I mean, how could that baby be her responsibility? This was my BFF since second grade – the girl who helped me sneak out my bedroom window when we were 15.

But there’s something bigger than all of that. Something I never knew before Lily was born. The road to parenthood isn’t always as easy as it should be. Heartache is far too common.

And so, when my good friend, Tere, finally told me that she was pregnant with the baby we’d eventually know as Cami, well, those damn 9 months just couldn’t go by fast enough. I’ve never wanted a baby so badly that wasn’t my own.

As the months dragged by, I got to channel a little of my excitement into planning a baby shower. I obsessed over colors, themes, and paper projects for a little while.

 

I got to pull out some of Lily’s old stuff and pile it on them. I remembered details of life with a newborn. I’m really pretty sure that I was more than a little insufferable. (And even after I swore I wouldn’t be!)

Among the 3,000 pearls of wisdom I was compelled to share, I had a video about soothing a newborn that I kept forgetting. (The Happiest Baby on the Block – seriously, a must-see for first-time parents.) I finally remembered to throw it in my bag one Wednesday afternoon. So naturally that was the day I got the text. Cami was on her way.

I think I jumped out of my ergonomically-unfriendly task chair. All that night and all the next day, I checked, checked, and rechecked my phone for more information. I finally checked facebook, and there she was. Baby Cami had arrived with ease (relatively speaking, of course), and she was as healthy as she could be.

I promised to wait patiently for an invite to come see her. (I wasn’t patient at all.) I got the OK a day or so later, and that Friday night, even after a little car trouble, I got to hold her for the first time. The little stinkpot didn’t open her eyes for me even once, though. Newborns!

The best part was seeing Tere hold her baby girl. She was an amazing mother; she slipped so easily and comfortably into this new role. She was happier than I’ve seen her in years.

I had to impatiently wait a couple of weeks to see her again, which is to be expected, of course. Tere tortured me by sending me the occasional adorable picture, but come on. I can’t hold a picture.

She was even cuter in person. True to newborn form, she ate, burped, and slept, repeat; it was wonderful. Tere went with the flow like an old pro. It almost seemed that having a newborn was a piece of cake. I said almost.

So, Baby Cami, you should know that you are one lucky baby girl. You have amazing parents who love you more than life. You have an army of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, who are stepping over each other to be next in line to hold you. And you have your crazy “auntie Katie” who will always have a camera and Pez. You have so many people who love you so much more than you’ll ever know.

You just remember that when you are 15 and contemplating breaking out of your bedroom in the wee hours of the night. And if my Lily is helping you, heaven help you both. You will be caught, and you’ll be grounded until graduation. You’ve been warned.